Poker is so F#cking dumb...

It's getting really hard to sit and play sessions anymore. Its like no matter what I do I just get fucked anyways. I've gotten some coaching/advice and been abiding by it and it is making great sense as it's helping me understand the game a little better. I feel like my hand reading has gotten better as well. All the effort I've put in seems to be for naught at this point. I mean fucking hell, seriously.

I'm not even gonna bitch about running below ev because I always do. I've tilted off maybe ~$100 of what I'm down the past few days after the incessant fucking beats that keep happening. And when I say tilted off, I mean calling it off. Flopping a set, getting 2 streets of value and we both have $8-$10 left on river and get shipped into or raised when I'm betting for value and going "Fucking seriously....you can't keep getting there".....but they keep fucking getting there. Flop a set, lose to a runner runner flush/straight. Flop a set get over set (6 times past 8k hands but who's counting). Flop two pair get counterfeited or lose to some ridiculous gutshot that gets there on the river. Aasdlnfaslgn;lahgfjkhafg!!!!

I want nothing more in this world than to succeed at poker so greatly at this point in my life and it's like the poker gods just can't/won't let it fucking happen. This hand opitamizes exactly how I've fucking ran and continue to run.

PokerStars Game #36804774756: Hold'em No Limit ($0.10/$0.25 USD) - 2009/12/16 23:50:33 PT [2009/12/17 2:50:33 ET]
Table 'Amanda VI' 6-max Seat #1 is the button
Seat 1: DragonzPlay ($10.65 in chips)
Seat 2: Dashornman ($36.30 in chips)
Seat 4: Whataboutj ($26.55 in chips)
Seat 5: AAA_369 ($19.25 in chips)
Seat 6: Me zorba ($13.40 in chips)
Dashornman: posts small blind $0.10
Whataboutj: posts big blind $0.25
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Dashornman [As 4d]
AAA_369: folds
Me zorba: folds
DragonzPlay: folds
Dashornman: raises $0.75 to $1
Whataboutj: calls $0.75
*** FLOP *** [4h 3c Ah]
Dashornman: bets $1.25
Whataboutj: raises $1.75 to $3
Dashornman: calls $1.75
*** TURN *** [4h 3c Ah] [9s]
Dashornman: checks
Whataboutj: bets $5
Dashornman: raises $7 to $12
Whataboutj: calls $7
*** RIVER *** [4h 3c Ah 9s] [Tc]
Dashornman: bets $20.30 and is all-in
Whataboutj: calls $10.55 and is all-in
Uncalled bet ($9.75) returned to Dashornman
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Dashornman: shows [As 4d] (two pair, Aces and Fours)
Whataboutj: shows [Ad Ts] (two pair, Aces and Tens)
Whataboutj collected $51.10 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $53.10 | Rake $2
Board [4h 3c Ah 9s Tc]
Seat 1: DragonzPlay (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: Dashornman (small blind) showed [As 4d] and lost with two pair, Aces and Fours
Seat 4: Whataboutj (big blind) showed [Ad Ts] and won ($51.10) with two pair, Aces and Tens
Seat 5: AAA_369 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: Me zorba folded before Flop (didn't bet)




Villain obviously types "ty" in chat after wards and starts to spout off how I was lucky to flop 2 pair on him on the flop blah blah.......the chat doesn't tilt me, its the never ending retarded shit that keeps happening and losing me fucking money. I could care less what some fucking 43 year old basement dweller thinks or says in regards to how I play a hand, just ship me the fucking money.....seriously!!

I go to bed each night thinking about poker and hoping that when I wake up the next day I will play better and run better/normal............apparently I haven't awoken from that dream state yet.