Poker is so F#cking dumb...

It's getting really hard to sit and play sessions anymore. Its like no matter what I do I just get fucked anyways. I've gotten some coaching/advice and been abiding by it and it is making great sense as it's helping me understand the game a little better. I feel like my hand reading has gotten better as well. All the effort I've put in seems to be for naught at this point. I mean fucking hell, seriously.

I'm not even gonna bitch about running below ev because I always do. I've tilted off maybe ~$100 of what I'm down the past few days after the incessant fucking beats that keep happening. And when I say tilted off, I mean calling it off. Flopping a set, getting 2 streets of value and we both have $8-$10 left on river and get shipped into or raised when I'm betting for value and going "Fucking seriously....you can't keep getting there".....but they keep fucking getting there. Flop a set, lose to a runner runner flush/straight. Flop a set get over set (6 times past 8k hands but who's counting). Flop two pair get counterfeited or lose to some ridiculous gutshot that gets there on the river. Aasdlnfaslgn;lahgfjkhafg!!!!

I want nothing more in this world than to succeed at poker so greatly at this point in my life and it's like the poker gods just can't/won't let it fucking happen. This hand opitamizes exactly how I've fucking ran and continue to run.

PokerStars Game #36804774756: Hold'em No Limit ($0.10/$0.25 USD) - 2009/12/16 23:50:33 PT [2009/12/17 2:50:33 ET]
Table 'Amanda VI' 6-max Seat #1 is the button
Seat 1: DragonzPlay ($10.65 in chips)
Seat 2: Dashornman ($36.30 in chips)
Seat 4: Whataboutj ($26.55 in chips)
Seat 5: AAA_369 ($19.25 in chips)
Seat 6: Me zorba ($13.40 in chips)
Dashornman: posts small blind $0.10
Whataboutj: posts big blind $0.25
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Dashornman [As 4d]
AAA_369: folds
Me zorba: folds
DragonzPlay: folds
Dashornman: raises $0.75 to $1
Whataboutj: calls $0.75
*** FLOP *** [4h 3c Ah]
Dashornman: bets $1.25
Whataboutj: raises $1.75 to $3
Dashornman: calls $1.75
*** TURN *** [4h 3c Ah] [9s]
Dashornman: checks
Whataboutj: bets $5
Dashornman: raises $7 to $12
Whataboutj: calls $7
*** RIVER *** [4h 3c Ah 9s] [Tc]
Dashornman: bets $20.30 and is all-in
Whataboutj: calls $10.55 and is all-in
Uncalled bet ($9.75) returned to Dashornman
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Dashornman: shows [As 4d] (two pair, Aces and Fours)
Whataboutj: shows [Ad Ts] (two pair, Aces and Tens)
Whataboutj collected $51.10 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $53.10 | Rake $2
Board [4h 3c Ah 9s Tc]
Seat 1: DragonzPlay (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: Dashornman (small blind) showed [As 4d] and lost with two pair, Aces and Fours
Seat 4: Whataboutj (big blind) showed [Ad Ts] and won ($51.10) with two pair, Aces and Tens
Seat 5: AAA_369 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: Me zorba folded before Flop (didn't bet)




Villain obviously types "ty" in chat after wards and starts to spout off how I was lucky to flop 2 pair on him on the flop blah blah.......the chat doesn't tilt me, its the never ending retarded shit that keeps happening and losing me fucking money. I could care less what some fucking 43 year old basement dweller thinks or says in regards to how I play a hand, just ship me the fucking money.....seriously!!

I go to bed each night thinking about poker and hoping that when I wake up the next day I will play better and run better/normal............apparently I haven't awoken from that dream state yet.

Poker, drinking till sunrise and strip clubs

Here are some pics of my new set up since moving and this is definitely the best computer/poker set up I've ever had.

This is 6 max so far since I first started talking with my coach/staker. I'm running ~8 bis below ev @ 25 over the sample but feeling better and better every session. The more 6 max I play the more I love it and look forward to continuing to get better and put in volume. I'm still playing some 25 eventhough I'm on the stake but I still dislike playing in a higher game if I'm not really comfortable with some certain things. I've been working on a couple hand reading issues that I've been having at 25 as well as working on spots to value bet thinner. I continue to be amazed how terrible the players are at 6 max (yes its only 25 & 50 nl) but 6 max just exploits so many more leaks that many regs have.

My friends Fantasticcow, BW07507, abstracktpb and zachvac are only here for one more week so I've been trying to hangout with them as much as possible before they leave. That being said we have had some pretty fun past couple days.

During the middle of the week we all (- Cow) went to K1 speed to do some go kart racing. I proceed to do a semi-sick hustle. While at dinner abstracktpb gave out his predictions for what position people would finish while go karting. I somehow got picked to finish last and he picked himself to finish first as he has driven go karts before. Well I remained quiet as I was picked to finish last and before the race we all agreed to $10/person for fastest lap time. I was happy with this and obviously run the fastest lap and afterwards inform them that I had a membership while I lived in Indy at a go kart place for a year in which we would race on a regular basis......ship ship the 10 spots lol.

Thursday night Cow, BW and I went out in PB for some drinking. This resulted in us getting fairly drunk. Also, seriously wtf is the deal with the bars shutting down at 1:30 and kicking everyone out then eventhough they dont "close" until 2 am.....seriously wtf. This has happened numerous nights now and leaves me pretty perplexed....but whatever.

We head to Dennys to get our standard after drinking meal. I somehow run good and don't lose CCR (credit card roulette). Abbstrackt and Zach come pick us up since they arent 21 and we being our strip club endeavor for the evening. It's ~2:30 am at this point and we head to the first club. We arrive and much to our dismay they are closed! We then ask a cabbie if there are any open in San Diego and head off to the next goal. Now part of the big urge to go this particular evening was that one of the guys had never been to a club therefore we just had to make it happen. After a ~10-15 minute drive to the other club, we arrive to stand in line for minutes while the staff didn't attend to us and we also heard the cover was $30.....ok gg strip clubs for the night.

So Friday night Cow, BW and I head out again. After closing down the bars we passed up our usual post drinking Denny's meal and wondered over to Pita Pitt. While I'm ordering Cow slaps BW out of nowhere and I'm like wtf. They are both laughing so everything is cool but im confused. I ask why Cow did it and he said just for the hell of it. I'm pretty drunk and I say "ok you can slap me if you pay for my dance at the club tonight.......AND my cover" to which Cow snap takes. While I'm waiting for the most delicious Pita of my life to finish being cooked Cow slaps me and I earn my club experience for the night. Afterwards Cow said he held up a little on the slap, which I was obviously happy with.

Zach and Abstacktpb come get us again and tonight we are determined to get these boys to the club. We have great success!! this time and manage to have a pretty good time in the process. Eventhough I had only been to a strip club 1 time ever, while living in Indiana my entire life I've managed to multiply that number numerous times since living here in San Diego. It's a fun experience and a perfect after bar experience if you aren't going home with some girl or something. The bad thing about the clubs in SD though are that they do not take clothes off during a private dance......seriously wtf?!?! Oh well its still naked girls on stage and a fun time with a group of guys at 3 or 4 am after a night of drinking.

After we get back from the club I proceed to play Cow heads up at beer pong for $10 a cup. We are both equally drunk at this point and come up with the idea to drink until the sunrise. Let the games begin. I'm pretty sure I won the first two games and lost the last two. The details are foggy at this point but I somehow only finish up 2 cups after four games vs Cow. We stay up and talk about all kinds of things such as going back to college at some point and how sick of a life we live and how fortunate we are. It was a really great night and I haven't had a night that included all types of fun with friends in a long time.

All in all the past weekend was my best weekend since arriving in SD. I've only lived here for ~5 weeks fwiw lol. It's 4 am and after sleeping all day to recoup from the past 3 nights of drinking until at least 4 am I might be recovered.

World records, girls and poker sucks atm

First off, congrats to my boy ChicagoJoey for breaking the world record for playing the most hands in 1 day as well as MAKING A PROFIT!!! He made ~30k ish on the side from the prop bet as well. I was fortunate enough to make a little money off the bet as well and I also helped him out the entire day playing mod in the chat/cam room, handling questions from bettors and helping with basic things such as food and fluids, lol. The record Joey set was broke a couple days later by Chiren but Chiren barely made any money and has since lost a ton of money attempting to play 1 million hands in one month.

Which brings me to this whole Pokerstars Pro fiasco that Chiren has created. For those who don't know Chiren80/Athene (World of Warcraft) screen name created his own PR campaign to achieve supernova elite on Pokerstars, which is worth ~$110k for the first year, as well as play 1 million hands to get attention and bring new poker players to Pokerstars. Long story short, we found out that Pokerstars said they never received his application to which he responded that he will be going to the Isle of Mann (HQ for Stars) to personally hand in his application. Now many people, not I, think this is some massive level and PR stunt by Pokerstars to promote the site and that Chiren has already been confirmed as an online pro for pokerstars, which is supposed to equal ~40k a year in incentives.

Whether you are a nut hugging WoW tard or a poker player that has basically no poker respect for Chiren, what he is/has done the past few months as far as bringing new players into the game can only be a positive. I personally do not think he deserves to be a online pro as he is not good at poker at all and is nothing above the true definition of a rakeback pro. However poker playing aside I definitely think that some site, maybe not Stars, should hire him to do PR campaigns/stunts as he has a huge following (I've heard ~1 million youtube subscribers alone) from the online gaming community. With that being said, I have mad respect for his grinding ability has he's played over twice the amount of hands I have this year and his overall goal of bringing new people into poker, whether its for selfish reasons or not, is a good one for the game of poker.

And for the record I do not think it is some massive level from Chiren and Stars. I think Stars does not want someone like Chiren, who could possibly be a loose cannon representing them on the business side of things. It's sort of a catch 22 because if Stars makes a breakeven grinder such as Chiren a pro I think it sends a bad message to the poker community but Chirens gamer followers believe this guy is the second coming. Therefore whatever site would sign some sort of promotional contract with him will definetly benefit from countless amounts of new deposits/players and influx of new fairly new poker players that will most likely be mindless grinders such as Chiren, that will in turn generate a ton of money in rake for some site.

Also, if Chiren continues to go for the 1 million hands, which I no longer think he will since the 1 million hands things was a promotion to get online pro in the first place. Joey has assured me that he will be breaking Chiren's daily record as well as playing more hands in 1 month than him as well. This I am 100% certain of and am very confident that Joey could/will set a record that may never be broken.

Girls.....fml am I right?!?!

As I am slowly getting adjusted to living where it never snows or enters the 40 degree climate. I am finding a sort of new unsuspecting problem in the form of spending the night with girls and having nothing happening. I've now spent the night with 2 different girls since moving out here in which NOTHING happened, I mean seriously wtf.......I didn't make a move and either did the girl and I'm just completely dumbfounded. And no these girls were not hideous, filthy etc.....It just didn't really cross my mind to fool around with them. I mean in the past I would have snap fooled around with them and not thought twice about it but I just don't even think about it while its happening.

I mean everyone knows when a girl comes over to watch a movie AT NIGHT or you go out with a girl and get drunk as well as all her roommates being gone its a lock right??? Especially when you are invited into bed at the end of the night. I mean wtf....all I can do is wonder wtf after the fact. Is something wrong with me, is it mental, an attraction thing or should I just donate my penis to someone who could use it?!?! Either way I'm determined to not let this happen again as maybe its just some mental block due to past girls or whatever. I'm not about to become a monk and give up using my penis so why not have fun. I mean that is part of why I moved out here in the first place, yet I'm not capitalizing on the situations that get handed to me.......sigh

Poker can pretty much blow me. I have basically switched over to 6 max for good and am loving it. However it obviously brings a little more variance and for someone who runs worse than most people imagine to, has not been fun. The past 3-4 months I've ran a steady 15-30 buyins below ev and its getting fucking old. Plain and simple. It cracks me up to read posts about guys losing 3 hands in a session with a set, an overpair and some guy sucking out to hit a gutshot straight....LOL welcome to every single fucking session of the past few months for me. I am not being bitter and just saying I run bad blah blah either. I know I haven't been playing well either but this running awful shit is really getting old. Anyone and everyone who sweats me happens to point out every time, "Man you run fucking terrible!" I just want to sit down and start booking wins and banging out hands but its tough to do so when I sit down and am snap down 2-3 buyins in ev every other sesh or so. It has really beaten me down and my tolerance for variance is basically non existant at this point.

With that being said however I haven't lessened my aggression or anything and have been playing more optimal since switching over to 6 max accompanied by only playing 10-12 tables anymore. I have officially become burntout on full ring and have always liked 6 max much better anyways. 6 max also allows for a higher win rate, an equal amount of hands per hour, with less tables, so more concentration and helps your poker game overall much more than full ring does. I am going to stick with 6 max for a long time I believe and also have some staking deals that I have to decide on. The staking offers are for starting at 50nl and then moving to 100 asap as long as my play dictates.

Also my first year playing poker for a living is approaching and I have nothing but happiness looking back. Although, I will say I am disappointed with myself as I did not push myself the past 3-4 months like I wanted to but many life changes took place and that effected me moreso than I originally imagined.

Over the next few weeks I will think a little more about the first year and maybe put together some sort of poo-bah post in regards to my first year playing for a living. Not something that is like "hey im such a baller blah blah" but some things on bankroll management, money management outside of poker as well various other important concepts that I seem to be asked frequently about when it comes to playing poker for a living.

Apparently Thanksgiving is almost here

Until a couple of days ago I was pretty much aloof to the fact that Thanksgiving is 3 days away?!?! I guess with everything that has went on in the past 2 months, regarding moving across the country and all the life changes Thanksgiving just slipped my mind. It's also very hard to realize what holidays are approaching due to the weather always being nice. It's always 60-70 out therefore its basically spring/fall to me. A close friend has invited me to his place with his wife and her parents for Thanksgiving dinner. It will be nice to be with a "family" on Thanksgiving and sort of take a break from the whirlwind that has been the past 2 months.

I have been grinding out alot of hands the past week or so and really trying to get back into the groove. It's almost as if I have lost the grinding mentality with all that has gone on. Now with things settling down my mind is clearer and I can start to focus back on poker. I played a nice 9 hour 12k hand sesh last Friday night as I started around midnight and got stuck a decent amount and decided to grind through till I was positive. I eventually went to bed around 12:30 pm on Saturday for a few hours and since then my sleep schedule has been messed up. I liked grinding through all night though as I havent done that much in the past few months and sort of proved to myself that I can and should more often. I think it's good to push yourself from time to time to challenge yourself.

I have been fairly happy with my play the last few days as I have been playing more 6 max and crushing it. It's interesting how 6 max forces me to be more aggressive, which in turn makes me play better. I think it's just the mentality that full ring is much nittier (tighter) and therefore a more passive game in general. I'm thinking of starting to really mix my play up to maybe 60/40 or 75/25 towards 6 max over the next month or so and see how I like it, closing out my first year playing for a living.

It is crazy to think I have been playing for almost a whole year after taking the leap. It's equally mind blowing to think how far I've come as a person, as well as poker playing within this year. I never would have imagined a year ago that I would be living in San Diego with another poker player and being moderately successful at my dream job. It's such a gratifying feeling to see and be allowed to do some of the things I've done due to poker. It's funny to think about the past year of my life and how I would not be where I am at today had I stayed in some of the relationships I was in as well as continued to go with the flow and continue with the insurance gig.

A couple relationships over the past year and a half have been very eye opening and have helped me a lot with life. There are two relationships in particular that affected my life tremendously pre/post break up and I am happy to be able to look back and take away the valuable life lessons that I learned in both of those. It's kind of funny to think when you are in those moments/relationships that that person may be "The one" or "A one", if you will, and in retrospect realize that the person you thought so highly of was actually cancerous to your life happiness and development. Overall, I hold no grudges and people will be themselves and pretend to be someone they are not. I am, as I have always and will hope to continue to be an honest person always doing what I think is right, even if it doesn't seem like the right thing to those looking in.

I am finally within 2 days of the 2k milestone. This fing thing has been the bane of my existence over the past month, it seems and I am almost finally there. I have a staking/coaching deal in the works for a higher limit with a good small/mid stakes player and I'm really looking forward to that as my first year closes and a new year approaches.

Again, I am finally at a very happy place in my life with everything seemingly coming together at once with this move to San Diego. I'm really looking forward to the next 6 months with Joey, San Diego and everything else that comes my way. Life is just great!!

Sprained ankle, stripper friend and some poker

I've played some poker this month ~17 hours or so through the first 9 days. I haven't been in the mood to grind that much. I have been playing shorter sessions and booking 2-3 wins a day. I want to get back into the grind and play 4-5 sessions a day because......money is a wonderful thing. Im now just over 10k vpps away from the $2k bonus and basically given up on the $3k bonus for this year. Im hoping to get that bonus this week and be able to finish buying things for the apartment.

I am finally starting to get settled in and not feel so overwhelmed. The past few weeks have just felt rushed with getting settled in and being unfamiliar with the area. As I was driving home last night, from the 2 story Target down the street, I breathed a sigh of relief of sorts as I am finally feeling less rushed and more settled in.

I sprained my ankle late last week after helping move the remainder of Joeys things in. I could barely walk the day after but things have gotten much better after days of icing, elevating and resting. Gotta love the fact that I can sit at my desk, prop up my ankle and be somewhat more productive at work.

We have met a few of our neighbors so far and one of them is a girl in the taking clothes off profession. She is really nice and I have been friendly yet somewhat reluctant to really get to know this girl but it has been interesting to say the least. It's cool to learn about that lifestyle as Ive never really thought much about it.

Phil Ivey & the November 9

A little look inside Phil Ivey's life thanks to the newest ESPN E60.

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=4620789

The piece is pretty good and gives some insight into the mysterious world that Mr. Ivey lives in and we all love to follow.

Television finally played all the way up to the final table World Series Main Event last night. These are the chip counts and players:

Darvin Moon - 58,930,000
James Akenhead - 6,800,000
Phil Ivey - 9,765,000
Kevin Schaffel - 12,390,000
Steven Begleiter - 29,885,000
Eric Buchman - 34,800,000
Joe Cada - 13,215,000
Antoine Saout - 9,500,000
Jeff Shulman - 19,580,000


Darvin Moon-fish. The hand with Billy Kopp where he check/calls the flopped Q high flush, then check raises the paired board turn and calls Kopp's shove is terrible by both players but just as bad by Darvin imo. This hand basically proved to me that he is your standard regular fish player who is not capable of laying down what he perceives to be the nuts without considering his opponents hand range in that spot. "I has a flush.....im allllllllllliiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!" Also its pretty easy to get AA/KK/88 at the perfect times and bust guys or double up every single time. I will give him credit for at least acknowledging the fact that he knows hes running good and is not a professional caliber player. I do dislike the fact that he said he would not get a coach nor wear any sponsorship patches for the final table. Apparently he really hates free money. He said something along the line of "I made it this far without a coach, Im just gonna keep playin my game." If you recognize that you are not as good as the other players then why not spend a few thousand to get coaching to maybe get a little bit of an edge???? I understand he is a simple man with very simple needs in life but don't be the arrogant old man and think you don't need help because "its not broke so dont fix it". Darvin if you run normal you will get crushed by these guys and will exitjust like Dennis Philips per last years final table.

James Akenhead-European tourney pro with success who is backed, seems like a legit player

Phil Ivey-best poker player alive. For Ivey to win would be wonderful for poker all around.

Kevin Schaffel-Part time tourney donk who kinda knows what hes doing....I've heard/read some interviews you can just tell by the way he talks about things hes not a really good player but has some concept....apparently

Steven Begleiter-Seems competent as some of the hands he played on tv. Seems maybe above average but probably not per hand reading and such but overall your standard amateur rungood pro who thinks and acts like hes awesome since hes run well for a tournament. I also have a strong disliking for the guy as he's an ex Bear Stearns high up vp?? or something

Eric Buchman-Apparently a pro from New York, but I don't know much about the guy besides some sponsorship fiasco leading up to the last few tables.

Joe Cada-Seems like a well tempered and mannered younger guy who actually recognizes the significance of making the final table and appreciates it. He also plays for a living....I think. I don't like that he is wearing UB logos leading up to to the final table but apparently signed a deal with Pokerstars or Fulltilt. Seems like a good player.

Antoine Saout-He's foreign and I know nothing about the guy besides the hand where Begleiter "playfully" hits him after Saout shows AQ and got Begleiter to fold 77.

Jeff Shulman-Obviously a good pro. He never really shows any emotion and seems to play a pretty solid game. I absolutely despise the fact that he said he would throw his World Series bracelet in the trash if he wins, however due to some personal beef/vendetta he has with the people running the tournament (whether that is the casino, media or people involved behind the scenes im not real sure). For a guy like him to say this (His family owns and operates Cardplayer magazine btw) is basically sacrilegious considering you make your living off of the game. I'm sure there are many things involved that I/the public do not know about but it comes off very d-baggy either way.

The final table starts this Saturday and will air the following Tuesday and I can't wait to see how it plays out.

The first weekend in San Diego

I survived my first weekend out in SD. Friday night in PB (Pacific Beach) was pretty sick for a nice start. Saturday we decided to go downtown as Joey heard from some girl that the place to be was downtown at some place that was charging a $50 cover.....fml right.

I obviously had not gotten a costume so I managed to procure a stethoscope from the party shop put on a shirt and tie and went as a busto doctor, basically. CJ went as a Chip N Dale, Brian went as Speedracer and Cow, obviously went as a cow. I don't know the name of the club we went to but it was 5 clubs rolled into one, so the place was really big and there were a ton of people there, so it must have been a good place.
Fortunately for us there were a ton of asian girls at this place. I'm not sure if there are just a ton of asian girls in the area in general or what but it was at least 60+% asian girls. After awhile it gets kind of old but it was fun for the night. All of us managed to talk and dance with some girls throughout the night. I of course refused to ask any of the girls for numbers because I'm a huge VJJ apparently......someday I'll put on big boy pants and grow up.

I managed to spend somewhere around $400 this weekend going out so gg going out for awhile. But, it was Halloween and our first weekend here, so we had to do it imo. Waking up in this morning was really weird. The time fell back 1 hour along with my already 3 hour time difference so my schedule is all kinds of messed up right now so hopefully I can adjust within the next week or so.

Aside from that, I'm gonna try and focus and get my grind on the first part of the month so maybe I can relax towards the end a little but we will have to see. Oh, my step-father is out of the hospital and home now as well. My mom called me the 3rd day I was here to tell me he had a heart attack and was in the hospital. Luckily everything went well and he is already out and at home. Crazy crazy crazy life all around